My new blog buddy Brett Trapp wrote this post on 28 things he’s learned in his 20’s. I loved it so much that I thought I’d take each of those things and elaborate on them over the next several days (since I’m about 3 months older and wiser than him.)
8. Speaking of marriage…it seems to me (from the outside looking in) that without lots of forgiveness and the putting of the other person first, your marriage is doomed. -Trappstr
Its funny how this one simple observation could save so many marriages. Passion in marriage is likely to fizzle unless you actively, intentionally nurture it. One of the easiest ways to continue to nurture passion is to simply put the other person first. Easier said than done of course. This is where lots of forgiveness comes in.
I always think of the story of Jacob and Rachel in the Bible when I think of marriage. Jacob was crazy about Rachel and asked Laban (Rachel’s father) for her hand in marriage. Laban said, “sure…for seven years of labor.” This is where many men would have given up, but Jacob didn’t blink.
Over the course of those seven years, Laban schemed up a plan. His older, less attractive daughter, Leah, was not getting any better looking. On the big day, Jacob comes to claim Rachel and Laban pulls the switch on Jacob by giving away Leah instead of Rachel.
Jacob was hacked. Laban offered Jacob a new deal – Rachel in exchange for seven more years of work! And Jacob went for it. This time though, he made sure that he would get Rachel at the beginning of the seven years.
I don’t know about you but after being tricked by Laban and finally getting Rachel, I would have snuck out that night with my new wife. But in Genesis 29:30 it says that Jacob worked another seven years.
In other words, Jacob continued to work his tail off for Rachel, even after he had her.
WOW! That is what we must all do in marriage. We must continue to work hard at pursuing our spouse, even though they are already ours.
